In a funky rut lately.

   I'm in a sad mood today. I'm not sure if it's the rainy weather we've been having or me realizing we've been here since September and I still haven't made any friends. I get REALLY pissed annoyed when people tell me "get out and explore" or "you just need to get out and meet people." IT'S NOT THAT EASY. In case you haven't noticed, not everyone likes Americans. So do go on a walk with my dogs and strike up a conversation and hit it off isn't realistic. I live in a small village outside the base. Mostly Germans, a good percentage are a lot older than me. Also take in account the language barrier.
    I don't mind making friends with someone who has kids, I love kids but I need a friend that can be my friend, not me be their on call babysitter. (It's happened before.) I know what I was getting into when I married my husband, I knew we would have to move around a lot. I just didn't know that our first PCS would be overseas, and I didn't realize how expensive it is to fly home with two dogs. Eeeek!
    It's hard for me to grasp my new outlook on life. I've had 3 best friends my whole life: Jenn and Chelsea who I've known since preschool, and Jayce who I met in third grade. We all played softball together, was in Cheerleading together, had countless sleepovers together, went to proms together, graduated high school together. It's hard not to have them in my life anymore. I regularly talk to them on Facebook, but not being able to see someone for years changes things. It's hard not to see my family either, I've always lived in a 20 mile radius of my entire family. All my grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles, my parents and brother so it's hard not being around them. I literally feel like half of my heart is 5,000 miles away.
   I'm hoping things will get better for me (that's what everyone says will happen) but it's hard to stay positive. Until it does I'm just going to keep throwing myself into this blog and trying to make someone else's day :) If you live near your family and have friends that you love like family, hug them tight and appreciate everyday you do have with them. 

               

               

{source}

Pin It